A little bit of Nowhere

A little bit of Nowhere

Ever notice how it's the little things in life that amuse us so much? More to the point, ever notice how it's the silly little idiocies in life that amuse us more than anything else? Well, this is not as much ''the little blog that could'' as it is ''the blog that enjoys going up the down escalator in your local mall.'' Will it have anything of real importance? No, probably not. But enjoy the ride never the less!

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Saturday, June 26, 2004

I Now Pronounce You Blog & Wife...

It's the day of Kevin & Donna's wedding, and as the ladies are all getting ready, the guys (myself among them) are just idling around at K&D's apartment. I was just surfing along the Net, checking out the random links Kevin has. I came to this blog, and upon seeing the date openly remarked, "Damn, this guy never updates! What kind of a lazy bastard is this?"

Then it occurred to me I was staring at my little bit of nowhere.

It's a wonderful blue, breezy day outside and things are looking good. I especially am looking good, but that's always to be expected. Kevin & Donna will be getting married in a few hours, followed by a large feasting of free alcohol and lots of meat. And by "lots of meat", I mean a farm is now void of its barnyard animals.

In between all the random run-amok that gets to be done in the meantime, I've got a few minutes to actually make it look like I made an effort at updating this. It'll probably be more worth my while to post a larger bit of nowhere tomorrow, where I get to reflect on what it feels like to be hungover, and what it's like to have an overly-drunk Mel bazenly trying to strip me nekkid in public. (When Mel reaches a certain point of inebriation, she gets, as she puts it, "blunt." My translation of this, based on past experiences, is Mel standing up, pointing at me and stating in single-word sentences and no uncertain terms, "You. Pants. Off. Now."

Yep, weddings are a beautiful thing. The blushing bride. The groom who stands there grinning like an idiot. Food. Friends. Free booze. But when you get right down to it, it's all about the sex.

I wonder how long it'll take for Mel to read this post. Alas, I don't wonder how long it'll take her to hurt me afterwards. Once she locates me, pain will be swift and in .6 seconds.

Today's Lesson: nothing quite beats watching "Return of the King" on DVD on a bigscreen plasma TV with an amazing surround-sound speaker system. I can feel the evil of the one ring pulsing inside me...oh wait, that's the sub-woofer speaker. Gorgeous...

posted by Phillip at 8:29 AM

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